Winter's Child

Winter's Child
Sharon Hawley Flies North for the Winter

Monday, December 28, 2009

Windy Cold

After forty days in the Icebox, I have come to believe certain things. These are not the same as things I observe, measure and record, nor things I deduce. No, there are some things of which I say, “I hold these truths to be self evident.” Upon such belief, I proceed to build a life as America built a nation. If you prove me wrong with science, I will smile and acquiesce, but my beliefs will not change. They will comfort me and guide my actions far longer than mere reason or science.

One such belief is that “cold” is not just the absence of heat as science says, but is instead a real quality, more real perhaps than heat. Aristotle called it “primum frigidum” and has been “proven” wrong. But I know he is right because I know cold.

Now, you will respond by saying, “Define cold.”

As soon as I try to define it, something goes haywire, so I say that it can’t be defined. And I hear you say, “But definitions are the foundation of reason. If you can’t define “cold” there is no way you can say it exists.” Please forgive as I have this dialog with you, writing your thoughts with my fingers, I do enjoy it; but defining “cold” is like defining art; it leads to wonderful schools of experts who determine where each artist succeeds or fails. Some things are best left undefined.

I can single out aspects of “cold” such as pinpricks, numbness, shivers, icicles hanging from glasses, creaking sound of a frozen coat, squeak of boots. But these do not substantiate its existence; and it does exist. With definition blocked, I view “cold” as a romantic, undisturbed by thought structures. Without cold, poetry about it would disappear, since it has no practical value and seldom makes sense.

When I am Nordic skiing in a wind chill of say, minus twenty, I see the world as a trinity of cold, mind and matter. The past exists only in memory, the future only in plan. Present and cold, the only reality. Cold is the parent of mind and matter, the source of all subjects and objects. And now you are about to say, “This is preintellectual and unimportant in light of science and reason.” Or maybe I have convinced you; it doesn’t matter. Today, I met cold again, my ski tracks left in the past.








Oak leaves die in the fall as do birch, alder and lilac leaves. But unlike its peers, the tree holds onto a few of its summer memories. They flutter brown and brittle far into the winter. Only in a strong wind do they detach and land on snow as the only memories of summer.










Dry and not much growing
desert wind from the arctic













Some folks are not much into snow removal.

11 comments:

  1. i like the last approach... just sleep through it and leave the car under a blanket too...? My approach to cold is not so philosophical... but more intuitive... I was unconscious as a child... so no choice... but I wole up and became intuitive... if it;s cold go get warm...! Live in Pasadena! However I worry about Liz who went to the desert and I think she is cold anyway...

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  2. Ooooooh! The steadfast leaf is there... did you perch it there... or did it naturally attach itself under the snow?? I that!!!

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  3. The leaf is just as I found it. I saw it standing there and immediately the painting by Charles Burchfield, "The Steadfast Leaf" came to mind.

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  4. i wonder what kind of car is under the snow? I need to find a new car quick as mine died. I am looking at a white prius. The snow topped car could be a prius....
    It is white.
    It is saving gas and being environmental parked that way.
    It is fashionable looking in its shiny white decor. It certainly is not going to overheat in its current condition.
    Maybe it is a prius.

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  5. I commend you on your poetic and thought provoking discourse on the meaning of "cold." This passage reaches into the core of your journey and philosophical wanderings for me. As I noted before in a comment on another day's experience in this blog,"cold" is in part interpretative and personal. Of course there are devices and procedures that attempt to capture and quantify it-to corral it into the limited, fenced-in enclosure of reason and science, but it is also (as you say) belief and individual determination, poetry and perspective, emotional and visceral, whistling wind and silence beyond frozen music, the momentary knife and the cummulative, drawn out gnawing of bone bitter chill, the sweet of rescuing warmth and the sugar of powdered snow. This, that, and thisthat and more.

    thank you for exploring the reaches and range of it for me

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  6. Happy New Year, Dear Eskimo!
    I wonder how many words the eskimo have for cold?

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  7. Susan, you always apply poetry and art to life in meaningful ways.

    “the momentary knife and
    the . . . drawn out gnawing of bone bitter chill
    the sweet of rescuing warmth and
    the sugar of powdered snow”

    I love it!

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  8. Hello Hello, I'm back! Lovely tree pictures, Sharon. The picture of the ice moving into your apartment was unsettling. I am praying for the health of your heating system and am very impressed at it's ability to provide a 100 degree buffer between you and the frigid outdoors.
    I enjoyed your discussion of cold, especially the line with the words "cold and present, the only reality." Extreme surroundings do focus the mind, and can provide blessed relief. It is rare to have pure sensations. The slight element of danger also helps to focus the mind.
    In your case, you have to navigate in an environment that could hurt you, if you fell, or stayed out too long. For me, a very long time ago, it was rock climbing. I was a weekend warrior for a couple of fall and spring seasons when I lived close enough to New Paltz to get there to climb. Being up above the ground far enough so that the people below looked small was focusing. Clinging by fingertips and toes to a cold stone face did not leave much room for mind wandering. I loved it for that reason. I was fortunate, with two friends who were very competent climbers, with good equipment. I was protected and safe (mostly), as you are by your protective layers. But it was a thrill, and climbing gave me rare moments of clarity and focus. Thanks for bringing that back, hadn't thought about climbing in years.

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  9. Forgot to sign off after posting. Best to Sharon and online friends, Liz

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  10. Wow, Liz, I didn't know you were a rock climber. I did it once and was scared so bad I could not balance. I did not enjoy it for that reason, even though I love hiking. I think we all have ledges in the earth where we feel satisfied, even if not completely safe. Those are good places.

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  11. Cold is only a state of mind, and I believe for the first time in your life you have grasped it. Life is all about, "Live and learn", and learn through your experience. One of the reasons I am so fascinated by your adventures, is because you continue to live.

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